Monday, August 29, 2005

Dave, Scott, Kevin, Bruce, & Mark were my first true loves.

Well. I figure I ought to contribute to this thing sooner or later, and since Maria just put a computer in my lap, there's no time like the present.

I suppose the first thing I ought to do is reiterate Maria's point that we all like each other. The ongoing quarrel between Aaron and Moray is really just a brotherly competition at a game called "Monkeyball". My three roomies (or, as Moray would say, "flatmates") are all really into video games. I'm not.

The second thing I feel I ought to do is give a brief description, from my humble point of view, of our cohabitation over the past week and a half. It can be summed up pretty simply: We stay up far too late each evening, laughing at each other's antics. Aaron, in particular, keeps me in stitches with his quick wit. I hope that his brilliant wit comes across to our readers (and I think it does, because I'm pretty sure all of our readers live here and know Aaron). He does, as evidenced by his earlier posts, have a rare form of Tourett's Syndrome that focuses, ironically, on the female reproductive system. But that only adds to his hilarity, even for forward-thinking women of the 21st century such as Maria and myself.

Once we've all giggled ourselves into the wee hours of the morning, we retire to our respective rooms, only to arise several hours later and resume giggling. The mass consumption of coffee commences. At some point in the day, we revisit a junior high school obsession of mine by watching reruns of "Kids in the Hall". Moray and Maria bought the second season on DVD, and my inner sleeping "Kids in the Hall" giant has awakened. I've become aware that either (1) I was entirely too young to be watching KITH when I first fell in love with the show, or (2) 13 year-olds are far less naive than grown-ups think. I think, actually, it's both. No wonder my mom used to get so upset with me when she'd find that I'd woken myself up in the middle of the night to watch the 2 a.m. reruns of KITH. I used to think that it was the hour that upset her; now I think it might have been the men in drag, adult humour, and occasional references to Satan. But it was all in good fun. Those five guys were brilliant.

Each day also inevitibly includes a visit with the kitties, Olivia and Basil. They're just unbelievably cute. If you knew Moray, you'd understand how important it was to introduce kitties to this household. Frankly, I'm not sure how I'd feel about living with a kitten-less Moray. (Just kidding, Moray. Sort of.)

But our giggling, "Kids in the Hall" filled, kitten-fest days are numbered. Well, at least mine are. After two weeks of between-jobs relaxation, I'm headed off to my new job tomorrow. I am the only member of this household who will be working regular, Monday through Friday, 9 to 5 hours. Nevertheless, I'm pretty psyched about the new job. It seems like an ultra-cool place, with ultra-nice people. And it doesn't hurt to have the well-wishes of my crazy Jersey roomies. Thanks for your earlier post, Aaron. Hurry home! =)

An invitation to the ones I love!!

This is a message to the roomies I hold so dear! Hey kids...it's me...I'm at work again...or still...I don't know anymore; I have however learned "I don't want no Scrubs"

Any poop, I wanted to invite you to look at my attempted solo Blog "How I cope with my anxiety and vaginal tourettes" it is whimsical look at one mans attempt to unclog his writers block with Drano!

On a household note, I would like to take a moment and wish the love of my life Liz goodluck on her adventures into NYC employment! May the morning commute gods smile down on you and grant you a round trip seat. May the Coffee Shop muses join together and grant you inspiration and energy!!

All My LOVE,
This is Aroma, signing off

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Gentlemen!

I'm taking that damn monkey ball, and mysteriously replacing one of your old 90's Brit-pop DVDs with it. I'm not saying which one. This blog has digressed to a level I never thought possible in only 48 hours.



In other news, we all actually get along, and love each other dearly. Here is Beth Ann/Liz, pronouncing my marriage to Moray official, for example. See? True friends get their internet ministry so they can marry their friends. For them, not to them. Just to clarify.



Here is another example of our truly loving dynamic. Here, you'll see Liz/Beth Ann and Aaron have confiscated Moray's father's camera, and surreptitiously taken glam shots of themselves on his digital film. They look spicy, don't they?? Looking good, guys!

You haven't seen the last of me.

Yes, I did leave the house. How it warms my heart to know the comfort my absence brings. I may be wasting my time helping out my fellow man (or the occasional nursing home client with a toe nail shaped like the Empire State Building, that I scraped my arm on)! But soon I shall return from this selfish task, and when I do I will squash the twisted evil manical Moray.

See what many of you don't know is how he treats the cast of monkey ball. He starves and threatens them. He gets high scores by spreading lies and fear throughout the land of Dole. So I will be back and will have PETA on my side (I guess that makes me hummus, but I digress) You may have trumped my HIGH score but don't count your monkey balls before they spread. I will be back and when I do there will be reform; equal rights for multi-players!!!

Peace,

Double-A Guevara

Another day another anxiety ridden dollar!!

I throw an exasperated hand to my head and swoon in turmoil. It is time again for work and I must go. The roads are rough. The path I travel is not to be envied. You see not only am I a Cat Scan Tech tethered to the crucifix of radiology. I am also a drama queen. Yes it is a heavy burden for these narrow shoulders to carry. Day to day, week to week, lifetime to lifetime my thoughts are raveged and raped by hyperoblistic notions and perceptions. Yet, I am but a simple martyr and tough though the job may be, someone must whine about it, and that someone is me!!

(Forgive any comma splices you may find; what I lack in grammar I make up for with a hearty dose of melodrama.)

Saturday, August 27, 2005

To end this sorry affair.......

I won monkeyball, Aaron left for work, with his dreams in shatters, peace at last in our house in new jersey as the natural balance of life is maintained.

For the love of .........

To correct Mr Jerome, I feel I have no option, on behalf of the whole house, that I must clarify the injustice and slanderous allegations and misunderstandings made against me. firstly, yes I did cry, I cried at the appalling loss of Aaron's life to this video-game 'monkeyball', as I feel somewhat responsible, the guilt is now becoming unbearable.
Secondly I then cried for the new found fascination Aaron has for all things ball related and how his new addiction is effecting both his eyesight and his use of the word vagina. Which you used to here him singing through the air with the greatest of ease, it is sad that the word is now relegated to nothing more than incidental comedy moments and blogs.
I call for an end to monkeyball for Aaron and a return to a more purer time, were the foul mouth can run free from all restrictions of addiction and Aaron will finally realise that it is I and I alone who rule multiplayer monkeyball. The single player high-scores are just a waste of a good vagina monologue.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Super Money Balls of Fire

I am addicted to you and your stuck in my brain.
I play hours I can't pull myself away.
My score is HIGH, made Moray Cry
goodness gracious Super Monkey Balls of Fire

I now know why the caged vagina sings...

This is a Double A one time exclusive

Vagina...how do I love thee let me count the way.

V-is for the Voice I sing to thee

A-with two is the way I begin my name

G-is very very extra Geni-tally

I-damn it you Inpsire me

N-your Naughty bits make me feel all dirty

A-I just plain give you All of me

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Our official post as husband, wife, and roomies

Hello, world.

I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce you to our little house in Jersey. This is a very special house. Why, you may ask? Well, I'll share a few brief statistics with you:

Our house is 50% married.
Our house is 50% male.
Our house is 1/3 feline.
25% of us are gay.
25% of us are from Scotland.
75% of us are from upstate New York.
100% of us adore Rufus Wainwright.
50% of us adore Martha Wainwright.
25% of us have a signed Martha Wainwright t-shirt that she still hasn't washed.
50% are Mac users.

25% paint seascapes.
25% of us are CT scanners by day, flash-dancing aestheticians by night.
50% of us have been friends since we were 8.
25% of us can play the clarinet.
25% are cancer survivors.
100% of us are under age 30.
100% of us work and study in New York City, and would rather commute and live in a happy neighborhood with cute little kids and their animals next door than step over the inebriated crackhead sleeping in the hallway one more time.

Well, that's a little about us. But what happens when a cabaret-singing stand-up licenced aesthetician, a recovering salvation army employee, and a married couple move in together? And get two cute kitties? Well, if you haven't guess by now, you'll find out in Our House In Jersey.

These entries will be made by all six members of our happy Jersey family: Maria (that's me), Moray (my husband), Aaron, Beth Ann/Liz, and from time to time Basil and Olivia will even contribute their own personal views as to what this house (and its bizarre happenings) are all about!

Welcome to the homestead



This is Basil. Basil is our test subject today, he's trying out this brand new space at blogger.com. He and his sister, Olivia, will be the official spokeskitties for Our House in Jersey. Here is a picture of Olivia.

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